通過 plot twist 在 GCSE拿高分

“I believe a significant addition I added…was a humorous plot twist at the end,” 一個在GCSE English writing部分拿到滿分的英國學生, 在學習交流平台The Student Room這樣分享他的讀書心得。Plot twist 的確是很好的寫作工具，因很多時候，學生只注重 be descriptive, 以為similes and alliteration 等修辭用得越多越好，卻不注重構思故事情節。如果學生知道故事尾部要來個Plot twist，在故事構思上自然也會多下功夫，而不是一味沒目標地 be descriptive 下去。

下面兩個故事充分演示（1）過度用修辭的效果和（2） plot twist如何能為故事增添色彩。

Look at the image provided. Write about a time when the weather was memorable

”Descriptive” version

The horrible howling of the rain was so deadly deafening that my ear drums felt they were bursting. The bitter blowing of the wind made moving forward felt like wading through thick mud. In addition, half the city was hidden by thick flog.  I was filled with frustration and hopelessness.

Still, I had to move forward, for piles of files were waiting for me at my office desk. Giving up wasn’t an option. Yet, each step was so hard. My breath was being taken away. 

The wind was howling even stronger now. I wanted to give up. Each step felt as heavy as a dumbbell. I heaved with pain and panted like a dejected dog.

As I continued moving through the thick fog, I was sweating like rain. Thinking of work, I pushed myself forward. Each step felt even heavier.

When I finally reached the office, I was as exhausted as a pitiful prey that had been cruelly chased.

“Plot twist” version

I hate Mondays, but this Monday was even more hateful than the rest.

The night before, the weather forecast app on my phone had already alerted me of an incoming rainstorm, but only when I stepped out of the house did I grasp what I was truly up against: gusts of wind too relentless for my trusty umbrella, fog too thick for me to see beyond 10 feet,  road surface too slippery for my leather-soled shoes.

To compound my Monday blues, today was the day I had to make a presentation to a client who could make or break this year’s sales target. Despite my best suit and tie, I would be arriving at their office looking like a Ken doll that had been battered against the wall by a nasty three-year-old.

My normally sturdy umbrella was now offering so little coverage that even the hair in my nostrils was soaked. Not that I could tell how much of that was rain and how much was my nose running in the 3°C cold.

I finally arrived at the client’s office, bracing myself for the worst. The moment I saw the manager, however, I felt a wave of relief: he must have reached his workplace only a little ahead of me, for he hadn't had time to tidy himself up and looked like a battered Ken doll too.